‘Game Show Fixture’ Charles Nelson Reilly, Gay, Dies at 76

Kidding. That’s not really what the headline says.

Charles Nelson Reilly and Paul Lynde had three things in common:
1) They were both on Hollywood Squares.
2) They both had colorful, exuberant, ostentatious and ribald personae.
3) I didn’t know either of them were gay until they were dead.

What is this “gaydar” equipment of which you speak?

What can I say? I was a child of the 1970s who had it drilled into me (no pun intended, honest) not to think that any effeminate man is automatically homosexual. It’s wrong to stereotype. Gays can be big lumberjacks or truckers or cowboys, at least according to that All In The Family episode where Archie finds out that the macho guys in a bar are all gay.

So, being a fair-minded individual, I try to never assume that someone is gay even if on TV they have the persona of a raving queen. After all, that’s just TV. It’s not like Milton Berle was a woman, or Ron Perlman a catlike creature who lives in the sewers. So I figured that this was just what Paul Lynde, JM J Bullock and, apparently, Charles Nelson Reilly were doing as character bits. I know that seems naive, but it’s basically how the entire nation regarded Liberace for decades. Dresses up in frilly outfits? That’s just showmanship.

I didn’t even think Boy George was gay. I know, I know, that sounds stupid, but he’s a musician! What, do you think KISS is really made up of alien clown soldiers or whatever they’re supposed to be? No! So it’s reasonable to think that Boy George just wants to get attention in a competitive music industry, so he’s dressing like a girl. Oh shut up.

Despite a lifetime of finding my “benefit of the doubt” indistinguishable in the end from “having no judgment whatsoever”, I still think it’s a good philosophy.

Now, I’m going to get away from all this talk about effeminate individuals and relax with some manly music. First up, Macho Man by the Village People.

Oh shut up! They are not!