In just a few days, J.J. Abrams launches his new “Kirk and Uhura’s Infinite Playlist” movie, and I am forced to admit that the Onion video I linked a few days ago was pretty much about me.

This new movie is about a car-stealing reprobate who gets challenged to enter Starfleet and he makes it to Captain despite looking like a college sophomore. From there it’s all making out with fellow officers, explosions and sky-diving. I don’t know whether they’re seeking out new life forms and new civilizations so much as doing the Dew.

I just realized that my “young, hip” reference about extreme sports is actually older than my 17 year old niece.

I think this is what we were all afraid of when…ages ago, in the early 1990s… they proposed a “Starfleet Academy” movie with all of the Star Trek cast played by younger actors. It wasn’t that it was sacrilegious to have anyone besides Shatner, Kelley, Nimoy, Doohan and the rest filling those parts… well, I’m sure for many Trekkies that WAS the entire problem… but that if not done well, the new actors would fall short and it would be a meager end to the series.

As it is, this movie looks invulnerable to failure. It’s got enough action and sex to pull in the masses and achieve a good box office take.

Nevertheless, ever since the trailers began for this movie, I can’t escape the thought: Remember when Star Trek was about exploring new planets and dealing with alien situations that were somehow allegorical to our own lives?

It’s nice to see a Star Trek movie being a big hit, but I can’t escape the feeling that it’s going to be a movie without a soul. Heck, even the dreaded Star Trek V had a soul.